— And once again, the sunlight slips between my fingers, giving me a taste of what I can see but can never feel.
You wake up and the melancholy consumes you. All you want is to turn off the lights, tug the blanket tighter around your body, numb the pain, silence the world for just a little longer.
But you don’t.
You get out of bed, make it neat and tidy. Strip down and climb under the stream of the warm water. You towel off, brush your hair, throw on clothes, apply your makeup, put on a coat, climb into your car.
And you think to yourself… I did it.
It was a small victory, but it was a baby step.
And those matter.
I knew it would happen,
It was never supposed to be a surprise
Hell, you even warned me
You couldn’t be there forever
But that doesn’t help cushion the fall
When the world keeps crumbling
And my best friend is no longer by my side
But you wanted more
And I could never be what you needed
And now that you’re gone
Do you even realize you took a part of me with you?
I hate wanting something I can never have
What hurts even worse
Is that you will never even know
you are everything I want
Loneliness comes and goes
Like waves pummeling down on the shore
The water rises, knocking you down
Then slowly, the tide draws it back
You can try to run away
Like children jumping to avoid the fast-approaching water
as it slithers up the sand
But no matter how hard you try
The water still catches you
You’re buried deeper into the sand with each wave that hits
Until you manage to wiggle your way out
And then the cycle begins again
As the loneliness comes in waves
How do you still manage to do this to me?
I try so hard to not let it get to me,
But no matter how hard I try to resist,
You still claw your way under my skin.
Peel back my layers
Nestle your way under my scars
Tearing me apart.
— Exposing me, leaving me raw.
All the minutes, all the hours,
All the time I’ve spent in a frantic search trying to find the right song.
The perfect one to describe everything you make me feel.
My playlists may be filled with numerous hours of songs that scratch the surface,
But none of them do the trick.
I pine over certain verses, but the lyrics are never right.
And now I’ve realized, it’s because we never got to tell our story.
And maybe, just maybe, I need to stop searching for our lyrics.
And let us write them ourselves.